Learning to Trust the Flow: What a Fly Taught Me About Emotional Awareness
Many times, I find myself as a “get stuff done” kind of person.
My natural urge to get things done now, not later, combined with my years as a nurse, often causes me to slip into impatient habits. I have found myself reflecting lately: How do we know when to flow with the universe and when to push through discomfort?
A Message in the Wind
Wisdom from Spirit often comes through in unexpected ways, and this was the case for me one Saturday morning. I was waiting in a parking lot for my son to finish a Boy Scout gathering.
It was a beautiful day, which was a nice treat after the cold winter. I decided to open the car windows to enjoy the fresh air. As a breeze brushed against my face, a fly zoomed in and immediately went straight for the car’s windshield.
The fly began buzzing frantically, clearly unable to understand why it couldn’t continue its initial flight path to the open air beyond. It was as if an invisible block was preventing it from seeing what it was up against!
I tried to gently guide the fly towards the open window, but no matter which way I led it, it kept returning to the windshield. Several times it even flew right past the open window, not realizing that its freedom lay just beyond! Eventually, the fly ended up in a crevice at the base of the windshield.
It was at this point that I decided to stop trying. I rolled up the windows and decided to sit back and take in the scenery for a bit.
Not long after, I heard the buzzing again. The fly had found its way out of hiding and landed on the window next to me. Carefully, I lowered the window and out it flew, just as easily as it had arrived!
Stress and the Bigger Picture
Sometimes we get caught in moments of stress, and just as I did with the fly, we throw this and that at it, hoping for a quick fix solution.
It’s often our natural instinct to try and make things right and restore balance in our lives. This reactive response can be amplified by a history of trauma, leaving us reacting from a state of fight, flight, or freeze.
But when we are in this stress response — like the fly staring through the windshield and not realizing it’s actually inside a car and not outdoors anymore — we can fixate too closely on our external problems and forget the bigger picture.
Knowing When to Act
There are certainly times when we clearly do want to push forward despite seeming obstacles.
For example, have you ever had a work or school deadline looming ahead and procrastination is getting the better of you? It’s probably not the best approach to sit around and expect the Universe to place the completed work in your lap, all finished and ready to go!
Life is not a one-size-fits-all experience, and what feels right for one person may not feel right for another.
Our actions and emotions are often shaped through the lens of past experience, many of which trace as far back as childhood.
Inner Awareness
So, what lies at the heart of this matter?
In my own experience, learning when to take action and when to wait has meant getting in touch with my inner emotions.
Emotions are signals for us that there is something within calling for our attention.
In moments of rising emotion, like when I was impatiently swatting at the fly in my car, it’s important to ask ourselves:
What emotion am I feeling?
What sensations am I feeling in my body?
Is there a message or memory that this feeling is trying to communicate?
As we bring our awareness within, we build a bridge between our external experiences and our internal environment.
This bridge creates a more harmonious flow of energy, allowing healing to take place and your intuition to bloom.
Messenger in Disguise
Like a fly buzzing around your personal space, will you brush away what is calling for your attention from within, or will you take these moments as opportunities, and with patience and perseverance, bridge that connection to your inner wisdom?
To me, it is no coincidence that it was a fly that came as a messenger to impart this wisdom.
For a fly has such a short but mighty life, and no opportunity is wasted! And where others might see trash, the fly sees treasure!
Impatience, fear, sadness, anger… what do you see when you experience these heavy emotions?
Do you view them as something to be discarded or tucked away from view, or as gems waiting to be dusted off, observed, and honored, revealing the gifts that lay waiting in the shadows?
A Journey Toward Emotional Awareness
Building emotional awareness is one of my great passions, but that wasn’t always the case!
I was raised in an environment where feelings weren’t shared or expressed, and it took me a while to even open up to acknowledging their presence, let alone sharing them with others.
If this has been your experience too, having a trusted therapist can be a powerful first step in healing those childhood wounds.
Honor the Full Range
Society often encourages us to focus on the positive and let go of the negative.
However, love, joy, fear, sadness… all emotions hold equal value in our lives.
If you find yourself stuck in reactivity or closing off your emotions, there are gentle steps you can take to begin shifting that pattern.
Ready to Go Deeper?
If this story and reflection resonate with you, and you feel called to explore your own emotional awareness more deeply, I invite you to watch this video that I shared on my TikTok page.
In it, I walk through a simple yet powerful practice that I personally use when heavy emotions come up in my life.
Be Patient With Yourself
Remember, building emotional awareness takes time.
Be patient with yourself.
Trust that your Spirit Within will guide you in the right direction for your own healing and growth.